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Currently Playing: I Wasted The Best Years Of My Life

I wasted the best years of my life, and the part I can't get past is that I knew I was doing it the whole time. I stayed years in a relationship I already knew wasn't going to work. I wasn't fooled. I had it in the back of my mind the whole time that we weren't made for each other. I watched myself do it and I kept going anyway. You can't really call it a mistake when you saw it coming. And there are whole years I can't account for. I'm not talking about bad memories. I'm talking about none. Drinking, partying, nothing that made a memory worth keeping. Entire stretches are just a blur. The good ones I hold onto, I could count on my hands. That's what a decade got me. Here's the part I finally figured out. Why I didn't leave sooner. Walking away means admitting the years you already spent were wasted. So instead you spend more, just to keep from having to say it out loud. That's the relationship. That's the job. That's half the guys I know right now. You can't go back. That's the whole thing. It sounds obvious but it took me until now to actually feel it. I'm a third of the way through the book. I've still got chapters. I'm telling myself that, not you. What are you still doing right now that you already know isn't right? Subscribe if this hit home. This is Outside The Order. #regret #wastedtime #emptiness #realtalk #outsidetheorder