Uploads from zombiebeatz2000

Currently Playing: Mental illness takes it's toll!

I'll write more about this video after my doctor's appointment and stuff. But this is really just kind of showing you what I am like currently and if you know anything that could be wrong with me. I am trying to do a small self-diagnosis before I go to the psychiatrist so I can maybe suggest something or something. No, I am not looking for attention or anything. I think you can tell that I am not looking so great (not that I ever look great) and I do not think that having a mental illness is fun or anything. It really is not fun and I do not enjoy it at all. I would love to be a regular person and do school like everyone else does. No, I do not want to be a Hollister wearing clone but I would at least like to have my grades up and be happy. If you have hallucinations, depression, isolation, something dksjf whatever it is and stuff just tell me about it because I want to find more people like me. Notes: At the beginning I was trying to get the glare out of my glasses, I was not doing any weird twitchy thing or anything. I noticed that it looked like that when I was re-watching it, hahah. I learned that a lot of this came from social isolation, which I brought upon myself, so please do not socially isolate yourself. Honestly, I like being alone but I hate it. You know? The thing that hurts me the most is knowing that my mom's friend's children all look up to me and I have gotten worse and worse and I do not want them idolizing me so I really need to do something. At least medication to hide this. No, I have not done drugs, taken medicine, and I do not drink alcohol. At the end I was really angry but I realize that I do not look as angry as I was. Part of this is me not showing much emotion anymore other than this desperate kind of look. I don't know. Help me out, here. Hahah.