Uploads from Lucas Zelnick

364 videos · Lucas Zelnick

• Look at all these liberals feel empathy for a prison corrections officer
• I Go To War With A Local Judge and Couple Works With Serial Killers | Lucas Zelnick Crowd Work
• We're told by this crazy doctor that my sister is gonna die
• You mean it was more about the smell than anything you disliked about cracking his ribs open?
• She’s Not a Nazi, She’s Just Autistic & Is Seeking Our Advice | Mommy Issues Podcast
• The goth trans man I accidentally misgendered at my show over a year ago returns
• I have 3,000 questions for this man & the least of which is why he pawned his child bride off
• British people be coming at you with a really quick comeback that makes a lot of sense
• You were switched at birth, on a TV show & your Mormon parents own a Chinese restaurant in Texas
• They're advertising the job of mouse at Chuck E. Cheese on Indeed?
• I Think I Should Stick To Crowd Work… Or Crying | Mommy Issues Podcast
• Yeah, it was a tiny Me Too, but I stayed! But that's the Wells Fargo family!
• You met 11 days ago in Vegas at a Martin Garrix EDM show?!?
• Netflix Is A Joke Full Crowd Work Special | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• He got served divorce papers on the way to my show | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• You're a zookeeper, you drive the Planters Nut Mobile & you are a ghost tour guide?!?
• Cleaning Up Your Sh*t Just Doesn't Click In The Male Brain | Mommy Issues Podcast
• You're a gay Republican from Los Angeles?!? Did you get topped by the wrong guy?
• Yelling repeatedly, "Which high school?!?", totally fine if you also go to high school
• You're from Israel and you thought that was close to India?
• You ruin the community and then you leave, you're like a white guy with a beanie
• Heckler admits she might have autism but still thinks I'm the funniest person ever
• I Don't Know Why a Man Would Listen To a Boy & His Mom Talk Through Advice | Mommy Issues Podcast
• Kinsey 6 hetero girl with the backward snapback I was ripping on turned out to be a cancer survivor
• Fellow CEO nepo child & her family keep gaslighting me during my set
• Dancing The Day Shift Near Disneyland | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• You weld aluminum crates for the Department of Defense? | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• Heckler with Tourette's kept wishing me Happy Birthday during my show
• So Now She Has Some Kind of Stalker Situation | Mommy Issues Podcast
• South African dude gets me mixed up with the black comic who was on before me
• There is a crackhead so famous in Wilkes-Barre PA that it just made an entire crowd erupt
• My friend's dad snuck up to the door & listened to my hand job conversation
• This guy proposed to his fiancé n@ked on a n*de beach in Hawaii
• You've been engaged for 16 years & you're 100% straight because of how you carry yourself?!?
• This guy named Drawer from Canada knows my grandma very well
• It's Hard To Turn An A**hole Into Not An A**hole | Mommy Issues Podcast
• She found me on Instagram & then Googled the sh*t out of me
• This is what Trump's America is, it's your Spanish teacher's Irish
• Apparently There's a Defense Contractor Full of Trans Women | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Crowd Work
• Gay autistic couple met at Gay Night at Knott's Berry Farm 30 years ago
• Heckler requests I make fun of Mormons in a room full of Mormons & fromer Mormons
• If You Can't Parent A Jealous Dog, Don't Bother Having Kids | Mommy Issues Podcast
• Purple haired O.R. woman calls out her brain surgeon boss for committing medical malpractice
• Are you laughing so hard that it's starting to feel like a panic?
• There's just a defense contractor full of trans women just dropping bombs on brown people?!?
• This stoic, handsome young man who hasn't laughed at all when I talk about Israel or my giant loads
• Are daywalkers white Mexicans or Gingers without freckles?
• Stop Being So F***ing Judgmental of Your Grandfather for Moving On | Mommy Issues Podcast
• After her ten year marriage exploded, she called her ex of seven years a week later
• The Canadian black woman's white mother made her work for six years unpaid
• Gay Soldiers Who Met in Combat Are Married 10 Years | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• This woman wanted me to honor her dead gang member brother by making jokes about him
• This guy explains why his far right father who sometimes agrees with him shouldn't be a comedian
• By round of applause is it over 50% that someone is strapped in here right now?
• Gay military couple met in Afghanistan when Don't Ask Don't Tell was still a thing
• This woman in the front row kept distracting me through my whole show
• I didn't expect the cool black guy in the front to be like Ewwwwwww!
• Non-binary Holocaust denier at my show | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• You're pursuing a lifelong career at your undergraduate institution?
• Half Israeli, half white guy doesn't know what race he is | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• She Dated Him Before and After He Transitioned | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• This small town New Hampshire teacher's life sounds like a ghost story
• Pakistani girl who I thought was white was filming our conversation
• Security Guard for a famous billionaire's family shows up to my show high
• She has two black lesbian mothers that own a vegan soul food company & two older lesbian sisters
• There's a level of drunk white woman that can only make you feel bad
• Felon regrets getting a tattoo of her ex she met at the halfway house while he was in prison
• Half Bolivian, half Lebanese chef says he could turn me into a meatball really quickly
• This guy DMed me about proposing to his girlfriend during my show
• She's treating my comedy show like a conversation & responding to everything I say
• This Whole Section Wants Them Gone | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• I helped this woman realize she's polyamorous | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• You guys are kind of like the Republicans of diabetes | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• Black and Native American?!? That's a Bingo card, dawg! | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• 911 dispatcher who gets 200 calls a day doesn't feel anything anymore
• Number one biggest bug out on mushrooms is getting talked to by the comedian
• Goth friend used to be a cemetery preservationist until his boss was arrested
• Left the Rabbi a voicemail calling him out for ghosting a woman he dated for 4 months
• You hooked up before the transition & started dating after the transition | Lucas Zelnick Crowd Work
• You're the husband from Mormonism that stayed through the nonbinary era | Lucas Zelnick Crowd Work
• I Call The Guy Who Ghosted Her | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• The show's not gonna continue until you go to the bathroom | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Crowd Work
• Guy admits to cheating on his wife of 10 years with other guys
• This is my first time doing comedy for a lot of deaf people
• Mattress Actress in the polycule's special skill is throat goat with a Mary Poppins purse twist
• The south is the only place where white people re-gentrify Hispanic jobs
• Boss hooked up with her employee at a residential home for deaf and blind kids
• Audience member threatens to punch me in the face | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• So your ex-husband is missing for 10 years & your ex-wife is dead?
• Guy Gets Kicked Out of My Show for SA | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• Guy gets thrown out of my show for slapping a waitress’ ass & stocking a lesbian couple
• Gay together in college or bros in college and then it became something else?
• Black Mormon girl from Maine is the 13th adopted child in her family
• You got circumcised when you were 8 years old?!? | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• College wrestler calls me out for making fun of his sister in New York City
• Well she was in Minneapolis very recently | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• Your great grandfather was on the Titanic? | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• You can learn Klingon on Duolingo? | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work
• Probation officer for s3x offenders recommends putting all the p3dos on an island
• North Korean Trans Autist Takes Over My Show | Lucas Zelnick Stand Up Comedy Crowd Work